you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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