Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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