dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
