Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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