And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
Randomize
