I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Randomize
