i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Can you bring me the toilet please
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
