Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Randomize
