I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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