used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize