So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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