You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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