Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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