First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I came so hard my ears popped.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize