Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
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