she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Randomize
