In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
