u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
