Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
