Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
I'm gonna have a badass scar
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
