i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Randomize
