So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
