You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize