UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
