i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize