Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Randomize