he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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