I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
It's rum buckets o'clock
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Randomize
