He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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