Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
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