it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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