I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
i will never coherently bang her
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Randomize