I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
