His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
That married penis I’ve been riding offered to pay off my student loans. I was going to break it off because he has lousy stamina. Is being debt free worth putting up with mediocre sex?
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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