your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
