Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
There r osticjed everywhere
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Randomize
