Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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