they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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