is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
Just puked most of my soul out..
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize