AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
The Olympian is in my bed
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
