I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
