Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
