You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
