Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
