420 ftw
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
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