I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
