i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
Randomize
