i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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