I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
im about as happy as oj after his trial
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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