my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
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