ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
